Daily Archives: May 28, 2012

  • Well, this is a bit risier & shinier than I had really planned to be this morning. #
  • I wish epiphanies would respect schedules… I don't need to be distracted today, I got shit to do, man! #
  • @lexiswallow That god I don't drink coffee… I would punch a motherfucker in the throat for handing me that. "Morning! You're gonna die." #
  • I feel like I'm speaking the English language, but sometimes I'm not too sure. #
  • Man, I was in SUCH a good mood, too… Well, now that THAT'S shot to shit, who wants bitter invective? Anybody? #
  • @Amber_Raynexxx I seem to remember thinking it was pretty cool, too… #
  • @thedylanryan It's even worse at 3 am… so… sad… #
  • @jessicajaymes Wow… looks just like mine. Nice. #
  • @Lia_Lor @brianstreetteam @lucyvonne11 I'll bring the creepy old pervert! #
  • There comes a time in a vacuum cleaner's life when it ceases being a tool, and becomes just a thing to push dirt around with. #
  • The awesome thing about "Game of Thrones" is that, like "Californication," you can be fairly sure you're gonna see every woman in it naked. #
  • @Princess_DonnaD You didn't invite me, dummy. #
  • If it's so goddamned easy, I wish you'd tell me how you do it. #
  • "Janelle likes that black dick… what are you gonna do?" — HOUSE OF LIES. Awesome. #
  • My arm is getting tired from all this hangin'… #
  • @LeslieBarton87 Go with the hair. Look what happened to me. #
  • As books go, I think I'm ready for this chapter to be over so I can get on to the next one. #
  • @Lia_Lor I could send you a picture of my penis… that'd do it. #
  • After 20 years and a sort-of director's cut, "Alien 3" is still… just… awful. #
  • @PyrBliss I'm in. Let's do it. I'm already halfway there. #

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Humans are the only animals that have children on purpose with the exception of guppies, who like to eat theirs. — P. J. O’Rourke